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When online dating makes you feel bad

I first created an OKCupid account in , and for nearly five years, online dating and I had a tumultuous, on-and-off relationship. Then, in December of , I decided I would take a break from online dating—and that unlike my previous "breaks," this one would last for more than a few weeks. It's actually ended up lasting a year because after seven months, I met someone—and it was IRL. The biggest reason I had for deleting my dating apps was just an insufficient return on investment. Whether because we didn't have much in common or we weren't willing to put in much effort, my conversations rarely left the texting stage. When they did, second dates were rare and thirds were almost unheard of.
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When online dating makes you feel bad; · Online dating has a, Psychology today

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The Ugly Truth About Online Dating | Psychology Today

David Oragui. This product of social conditioning rears its ugly head online even more so, as an average of seven men compete for the attention of one woman. According to research, women who send messages to men are twice as likely to receive a response compared to men who start conversations. We men love to complain about how women have extraordinarily high standards when looking for a mate—however, we fail to look a little bit deeper at why this is the case. Everyone jumps the gun, telling you to personalize each message you send. How to fix this: Spin it on its head and give the headline more importance. Long story short, she was receiving a lot of messages from men who expressed their disdain at her choice for wanting to identify as a feminist.
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I Broke Up With Online Dating...and Met My S.O.

I want to find a man who loves me the way I deserve to be loved. That means being with a guy who makes me feel good about myself — a guy who celebrates my achievements and who lifts me up and encourages me to be a better person. I know my own worth. I know what I deserve and I certainly deserve better than a guy who makes me feel bad about myself.
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The world of online dating can be a painful and unforgiving place, especially when you're not in the right mindset. The digital love gods seem to have a penchant for making mildly hopeful, single people lose all faith in humanity. Nothing's worse than getting the same awful outcomes, one after another, when you're grappling with online dating burnout and bitterness. Based on my experience as a psychologist working with hundreds of online daters, the psychological toll that online dating takes on people's mental health is more about the way potential mates act online than the experience of countless, failed dates.
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